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Ibyo umugabo aba yifuza ku mugore mbere y’uko amushaka na nyuma yaho

Iyo umusore afashe icyemezo cyo kurushinga aba afite impamvu ndetse n’ibintu bitandukanye yifuza ku wo bagiye kurwubakana. Nyuma yo gushaka na bwo hari uko aba yumva umugore we yamera. Bimwe mu byo yifuza ni ibi bikurikira.

1. Ku mukunda no kumwubahisha

Buri mugabo ufite umugore aba yumva umugore we yamukunda kurusha abandi bantu, akamwubaha ndetse akanamwubahisha. Aha rero iyo umugabo agiye kurushinga aba yumva icyubahiro cye azagihabwa n’umugore ashatse akaba ari nayo mpamvu buri gihe umugabo aba yumva umugore we yamwubaha ndetse akanamwubahisha aho kumusuzuguza cyangwa kumutesha icyubahiro.

2. Ku mukundisha abana

Umugabo cyangwa abagabo muri rusange baba bifuza ko abagore babo babakundisha abana , aho guhora bereka abana ko se ari umuntu udasanzwe , ugira amahane cyangwa w’isidimba. Burya umugore iyo ahora abwira umwana ngo ni uko iki ndabibwira so si byiza kuko umwana ashobora kuzatinya se ntamwisanzureho kandi ulugabo aba ashaka ko abana be bamwisanzuraho bakamuganiriza. Ushobora kubikora ugira ngo yenda umwana akore icyo yari yanze gukora yagusuzuguye ariko si byiza kubikora buri gihe ngo bibe igikangisho ku mwana.

Umugabo wese yifuza ko umwana we yamukunda kandi akamwubaha, akamwisanzuraho , akamubwira icyo yifuza aho kumubona ngo amuhunge cyangwa ngo yikange n’igihe atari mu ikosa.

3. Ku musaba icyo afitiye ubushobozi

Iyo umusore arimo kurambagiza ahanini areba umukobwa uri ku rwego rwe, ushobora kuzamubera umugore akabasha guhaza ibyifuzo bye. Areba wa mukobwa utazamugora ngo abe yamusaba ibya mirenge [ibintu birenze ubushobozi bwe.

Iyo uri umugore rero ugatangira kwaka umugabo wawe ibintu ubona adafiye uba uri kumuvuna cyane kuko buri mugabo wese aba yifuza ko umugore we yamusaba ibintu ashobora kubona bitamugoye. Kunezezwa n’ubushobozi mufite mu rugo rwanyu, bwaba buke cyangwa se bwinshi, mukabasha kunozwa n’utwo mufite mutigoye ni kimwe mu bintu bituma umugabo yishimira umugore we kandi akishimira n’urugo rwe muri rusange.

Hari abagabo uzasanga iyo bari hamwe bateruye baganira kun o zabo n’abagore babo; bari kuvuga abagore babo umwe akavo akavuga ati “Jye icyo nkundira umugore wanjye ni uko atandushya, icyo dufite n’icyo icyo tudafite tukihangana.” Impamvu abivuga ni uko aba koko yishimye bitewe n’uko adahora ku nkeke yo gushaka ibimurushije ubushobozi kugira ngo anezeze umugore we atazavaho amuca inyuma akurikiranye bya bindi bihenze yananiwe kumubonera.

4. Kwita ku iterambere ry’urugo n’iry’umuryango

Umugabo wese aba yumva yafatanya n’umugore mu guteza imbere urugo rwabo ndetse n’umuryango wabo mu buryo butandukanye. Umugabo aba yifuza ko uwo bashakanye agira uruhare mu iterambere ry’urugo kabone niyo rwaba ari ruto ariko byibura yagerageje. Si byiza ko rero umugabo abona ko ari we ugokera urugo buri gihe wenyine kandi yarashatse umugore yiteze ko aje kugira icyo amwungura mu iterambere ry’umuryango. Umugore ashobora kuba atazi ko ariko ateye cyangwa se asanganywe ubunebwe.

Jya usuzuma buri kwezi urebe my byinjira mu rugo buri kwezi icyo winjije kandi n’iyo waba udafite ubushobozi cyangwe se amashuri ngo ubone akazi, icyo wakora wowe mugore ni ukugira umugabo wawe inama n’imishinga mwakora ikazamura ubushobozi bw’urugo. Iyo uhaye umugabo inama akayikurikiza ikavamo ikintu gifatika kiba ari nk’igitego ku mugore kuko umugabo abona ko umugore we atari injiji cyangwa umunebwe, atari uwo kwasama bagasukamo gusa.

5. Kwirinda amazimwe n’amabwire

Umugabo ntakunda umugore wumva amabwire cyangwa amagambo kuko iyo bimeze bitya bishobora gutuma basenya, ahubwo icyo aba yifuza ni uko umugore yamugirira ikizere gisesuye aho gukomeza kwizera amazimwe adafite aho ashingiye. Iyi rero ngo ni ingingo ikomeye kuko iri mu zikunze gusenya ingo nyinshi. Umugabo wese yifuza ko umugore we ya kwirinda amazimwe n’amagambo mu rwego rwo kurengera ubusungire bw’urushako rwabo.

6. Kugira isuku no gusasa ku gihe kandi neza

Umugabo akunda umugore ugira isuku mu bintu byose cyane cyane isuku yo ku mubiri niyo mu buriri utibagiwe n’iyo kuleza kuko iyo umugabo aje mu rugo agasanga icyumba kidashaje cyangwa uburiri busa nabi aba yumva acitse intege, rimwe na rimwe agatangira kwibaza icyo yashakiye. Kugaburirira umugabo ku isahane iriho umwanda ni ikosa rikomeye ku mugore; icyo gihe umugabo wawe ashobora guta apeti rimwe na rimwe ugasanga ajya kwirira muri resitora.

7. Kwakira neza abashyitsi

Bimwe mu byo umugabo ashakira umugore ni ukugira ngo abantu be , inshuti, abavandimwe umuryango bajye babona ubakira mu gihe bamusuye, aha rero umugabo akaba yifuza ko umugore we yagira uburyo bwiza bwo kwakira buri wese ugana urugo rwabo kugira ngo bakomeze bagirane ubuncuti n’indi miryango ndetse n’urugo rwabo rukomeze kuba nyabagendwa.

Mu kijyarwanda bavuga ko urugo rwiza ari urugendwa kandi ifuni ibagara ubucuti ari akarenge. Igihe umugore atagirira urugwiro abashyitsi, akabasuzugura cyangwa ugasanga aratontoma igihe hari umuntu w’umushyitsi uraye mu rugo ntibishilisha umugabo na gato.

8. Kurangiza inshingano

Umugabo akunda umugore usohoza inshingano, yiyemeza; ikintu akagikora kikarangira. Noneho iyo ari uwo yashatse biba akarusho. Aha rero bituma umugabo yumva ko yashatse neza ndetse akumva hagize ikimunanira hari umuntu wa hafi wahita amufasha.

9. Kumufata neza cyane cyane igihe arwaye

Umugabo ahora yifuza ko umugore we amwitaho, amuhora hafi cyane cyane igihe arwaye. Aha abagore babyumve ko nta mugabo ujya wishimira kurwazwa n’abandi bantu kandi yarashatse. Aba yumva umugore we ari we ugomba kumurwaza, akamuganiriza ndetse akanamutekere ibyo akunda kuko aba amuzi neza atarinze kumuvuna amubaza byinshi. Niba rero umugabo wawe arwara ugahamagara bene wanyu ngo baze kumurwaza umenye ko uba urimo gukora ibitandukanye n’ibyifuzo bye kuko aba yaragushatse ngo ujye umwitaho ubuzima bwe butandukane n’ubw’abatarashaka.

Igihe umugabo wawe ahuye n’uburwayi ufte akazi, bishoboka wakwaka konji ukamurwaza ni yo yaba ari iminsi mike ishoboka. Igihe ari akazi gatumye utabasha gukomea kumurwaza arabyumva ariko byibura uba wamweretse ko umuri hafi kandi umwitayeho.

Hari igihe rero umugabo ashaka umugore bakundanye cyane igihe batari babyara umwaka umugora akamwitaho cyane, bamara kubya urukundo rwose umugore akaruharira umwanda na cyane ko aba ari umwana wa mbere kandi aryoshye. Mugore uramutse ufite umwana yaba umwa cyangwa se benshi, ntugaharire urukundo abana bonyine ngo umugabo wawe umwibagirwa. Ni byo koko ita ku bana kuko ari byo bikenewe ariko siga akanya ko kwita ku mugabo wawe uko wamwitagaho na mbere n’iyo kaba atari kanini ari kabeho.
Shyiraho Igitekerezo!

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